My break from materialism

I was one of 4 kids raised by a single mom. We would have qualified for welfare but my mom was too proud to take the money. Instead she worked as a house cleaner during the day and a receptionist at night. She dropped out of school in the 8th grade so she also went back to school to get her GED and eventually got a degree. This process took about 6 years. We lived in a double wide trailer this whole time. We all rode in my moms 700$ for festiva, and once a month we got to eat Taco Bell. So when I was 15 I got a job at McDonalds and made almost 800 dollars a month and thought I was really doing things. My fast food career picked up steam, and by the time I was 19 I was the general manager of Del Taco, making $20,000.00 per year! I thought I had really hit the big time. I saw fancy cars once in awhile. I knew there were rich people in the world, but that life was a hoop dream to me. I never thought I could have a nice car, or own a house. Poverty was my fate.

In 2010 I reevaluated my life. I wanted to settle down. I got a job in oil and my life changed dramatically. I bought my first new car, a Nissan Altima and rented my own house. I made $49,000 my first year, and $69,000 my second year. Add up the two years and thats more than I had made in my whole life combined. I traded in my car for a 4 door luxury truck and a year later bought a lowrider motorcycle. When I moved out of town to work I bought a 5th Wheel trailer and in just four years had accumulated more toys than I ever thought I would own. I was living a dream. I had more than I ever thought was possible. There was only one problem, I wasn’t happy. I still felt empty inside like everything I had purchased was a placebo. I had begun to feel trapped by my own debt, and thought that all these things that I owned had made me a slave. I decided to sell everything and move to Oregon, and when I did I was left owing $5500! Five years and I didn’t own anything.

My first year in Oregon I lived off 50 bucks a week. I bought a rice cooker and a bread maker and a crockpot. I quit smoking cigarettes and only drank one 12 pack a week. (When I was in oil I budgeted $1000 a month for food and alcohol and rarely kept to that budget). I worked for a couple in Oregon about 20 hours a week and the rest of the time I went hiking with my dog. I worked out every day. I read many books and as the quiet mountain began to heal many old wounds I began to feel very content with very little.

My second year in Oregon I began to excel as a farmer. My oilfield experience made me a good manager and the internal martial arts I studied helped me connect to my crew in a way that went beyond management. I loved them. My boss was rapidly gaining success in the farming world and continued to offer me the top position in the company. In my last year with the company I was offered a partnership worth a little over 250,000.00. This made me pause and really think about my future. Did I really want to work 70 hours a week for someone elses dream? Would that money make me happy? In a final protest to the system I turned the job down and collected my payment for the year and went to the mountains to train tai chi and ask questions like who am I, and what is my purpose in life.

A year has gone by and I have taken to a simple life. I drive a little truck. It’s practical. It may not make babes flock to me but I like it. I work at an organic farming store part time where I get to talk about microbiology with like minded people. I train jiu jitsu with some great fighters, and I do tai chi and qigong every morning with my dad. I work with a local media company to strategize how to encourage art and culture in my home town of Bakersfield and I never worry about bills because I don’t have any. I mean I have whatever rent I pay for my room, and gas and food but thats it. I no longer find the need to buy things that other people have, or take out lines of credit to own things I haven’t saved enough to buy out right.

I think when you’re raised in poverty like I was it is natural to dream of nice things. What I have realized tho is that those things are not truly substantial. To have great health is substantial. To enjoy my time with my dad is substantial. To encourage local art, and to help my community, to ponder the meaning of life, to challenge myself every day. All these things have real results that I can measure. When I wake up and I am sober, having shaken off past addictions, and I can look at myself in the mirror and be proud of the person I have become. These things are measurable. I am not lazy and I am always engaging in something, but that motivation is not rooted in selfishness or greed. I work to create a better world. To increase the quality of my life, and hopefully reach my full potential. All of these things I have learned to do without buying anything. I guess the truth I have discovered is that the things most valuable you cannot obtain through any monetary process. They come from the heart and are purchased with effort. So if you see me in my little truck just know that I found all my riches internally.